Eveything to give away .
10:13 AM - Wednesday, December 31, 2008
So, today .Sighs .HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE !So, our plan didn't go as we thought it would, but as usual we always make it fun afterall . Firstly, I met Yati then waited for Ilah then waited for Zal and Farah . Then we went drinking at Swing . Then Yuyul came . Then Ahmad and Tita came . Then Rahmat Farhan and Shahreen came . Then Miss Jubs came . Me and Zal and Yati drank . Then Yati left at around 6 for Marina , and left us with 3/4 Smirnoff . Then we played card, sape kalah kene minom . So me and Zal had to drink it . And then Zal Rahmat Farhan Shahreen left for Downtown . Then I drank alone, but Miss Jubs nak siket . "Aku yang mabok ke kau yang sebok ." - annoying kaper . Baru minom due ke tige shot dah mabok . Then bought beer, I drank alone . Ahmad and Tita minom Bacardi, Tita kesian .Then we went separate ways . Ahmad Tita to Clarke Quay . And Yul's guy sent me Ilah Farah to Pasir Ris Park . At first plan nak countdown pat Downtown, but this year we didn't have the mood to, we have our reasons . Then plan was to watch movie, tapi Ilah kene jage Qiyah . Then plan was to karaoke , but slot takde . Then met Bitch and Pharies and Ina and Afa . Lepak jap, Bitch Pharies Afa went home . Then me Ina Ilah Farah decided to go karaoke .Gy pit Ina, aku terjatoh dalam lobangg . Right after saying, "Cik, sorry cik datang lambat." and giving way to Ilah and Farah to salam her . But not due to drunkness, due to clumsiness and rabun-ness . Mak Ina ketawe kan . Ina cukop time pon jatoh . Last2 Ilah and Farah had to pull us up . Mak Ina tried to help after Ina said "Ibu ble dudok situ lagy ketawe." Hahaha . Mak, Farah pulled me like I'm some kind of buffalo siak . Serious ! Then I was like ,"Sabar2 . But they kept pulling ." I was like laughing, they were too . I fell like fast or what sia, tetibe I was short . TERBANTOT. Too fast siak, couldn't even catch my breath . Ina jatoh slow motion .Then karaoke full, next slot kul 1.40 . Ina and Farah nanti tak sempat catch bus . So too bad . Kite makan, slack around . Gerek kape . It stiel fun, ketawe all the way .Then me and Ilah had a talk . Sighs .Studies is hopeless .Family is a wreck .Friends are falling apart, not by choice .I'm breaking down .Like the fall, it was too fast and I couldn't catch my breath .Labels: Bummed; The best way to start 2009 but by the 46th minute, the table turned around .
Ohhh La La La ~
7:54 AM - Thursday, December 25, 2008
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
Aina. Myra. Sepet.
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU'VE HAD:
applePANTAT. Myra Pebbles. appleBAMBAM.
THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 33 MINUTES:
Slack around at Ilah's crib. Smoke. Bathe.
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
[One]I'm chill chill chilly . [Two]I get along with anyone, everyone. [Three]I manipulate my words well to get to my point w/o being embarrassed or hurting someone (:
THREE THINGS YOU DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
[One]Kimek, aku boncet rabak . [Two]I'm lazy to entertain much that is unimportant, and people see it as a weakness. [Three]I'm super weak when it comes to my loved ones .
THREE PARTS OF YOUR ORIGINS:
Chinese, Java and as my dad calls it, SUMATRAN. What the fuck is that ?
THREE THINGS YOU'RE AFRAID OF:
Things from the other dimension, clowns and promises .
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
Oversize T-shirt, super short FBT shorts and hairband .
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
Ciggarettes, friends, bitch .
THREE IMPORTANT OBJECTS:
Kekayaan dah technology dunia(mp3, computer, shirt, goods bla bla bla), my Barneys and my heart2 blankett .
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS:
I like can't think right now .
THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY:
It's all in the mind babe, as said by I-know-who .
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
Too much luh to pick from .
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
[One]Try to unchange things and people in my life. [Two]Tattoo&drugs. Haha, like no . [Three]Get a proper goddamn boyfriend . DAYMMMM !
THREE THINGS YOU REGRET:
[One]Being there at the wrong place, wrong time. [Two]Letting things/people pass by. [Three]Being complacent about life .
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
A FAIR commitment, trust and comfort (:
THREE IMPORTANT THINGS YOU'RE GIVING TO THE WORLD:
Love, chances and truth .
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (in order):
Facts, my hair colour is weird and I'm wearing only one contact len . Lie, I'm want to be single for a longg longgg time .
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
[One]Sexy-ness, for example, through the melting eyes or the sexy lips or the way he smile . [Two]Hair ? I like dark colours like brown ? It makes him look sexy . HUHU . [Three]His style . Slack = abs visible = major hottie .
THREE EMOTIONAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
[One]Blurrness ? [Two]Just knowing how you feel at that moment, and knowing what to do. [Three]Honest sweetness .
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
[One]Just stay un-hyper for more than an hour . [Two]Stop blushing when I start blushing . [Three]Understand the nature of these creatures called MEN .
THREE THINGS YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST:
[One]My aunt who took care of me. [Two]My innocent childhood. [Three]My home at Bedok North Block 92 and forgotten what block at Eunos ?
THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
A whole new wardrobe . Infinity dollar of cash and a genie !
THREE REASONS WHY YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE:
My loved ones, experiences, time .
THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
Sleep, slack, shopping .
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
Being hugged cause it's frigging cold, smoke and begin a new life .
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
Eyh, I don't know where . Yes, I'm dead, I know .
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR HOLIDAY:
Amsterdam =p California and NEW YORK CITA ! ! ! !
THREE CARTOON CHARACTERS:
Timmy Turner, Patrick Star and Billy .
THREE BOY'S NAMES:
Jake(Hot American), Jay Chou(Chinese), Raphie(Malay)
THREE GIRL'S NAMES:
Chloe(American), Elaine(Chinese), Ain(Unglam Malay =p )
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
Take every drug in the world and enjoy life, beg for forgiveness, TAUBAT babe !
THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ OR DIE PAINFULLY:
Sesiapa yang hendak bikin, bikin la kau !
Labels: Bummed; I'm tired of what if's
Things should be this way .
9:58 AM - Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Somewhere over the rainbowWay up highAnd the dreams that you dreamed ofOnce in a lullabySomewhere over the rainbowBlue birds flyAnd the dreams that you dreamed ofDreams really do come trueSomeday I'll wish upon a starWake up where the clouds are far behind meWhere trouble melts like lemon dropsHigh above the chimney tops thats where you'll find meSomewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds flyAnd the dream that you dare to, why can't I?Well I see trees of green andRed roses too,I'll watch them bloom for me and youAnd I think to myselfWhat a wonderful worldWell I see skies of blue and I see clouds of whiteAnd the brightness of dayI like the dark and I think to myselfWhat a wonderful worldThe colors of the rainbow so pretty in the skyAre also on the faces of people passing byI see friends shaking handsSaying, "How do you do?"They're really saying, I...I love youI hear babies cry and I watch them grow,They'll learn much moreThan we'll knowAnd I think to myselfWhat a wonderful worldLabels: Bummed; Putting me in a gas chamber filled with problems but I still won't breathe it in .
Gone Introvert
9:29 AM
Well, life's been a bitch lately .Everything goes wrong .I can't care anymore .Just chilling, flowing through each day .Sometimes it seems, the more I care the more pain I have to go through .So why care ?Do whatever you want dad, but you're gonna have to tell her and your children yourself .And boy, say whatever you want to say .But the fact remains that we both have move on .You got to let go of the fact that we're moving on so fast .I'm not going to elaborate .Simply, Life's.A.Bitch.Talking about bitch .My bitch's been nice .Just accompanying me when I need company .(:And his line still remains, "Life is all about ? CHOICES."And yesterday , I had to bring down Sixth Sense to my house to sing Tanpa to him as a lullaby .I've been drinking for the past 6 days .With friends or just alone .Dah macam pompan giler kapeee !Didn't know I would do that siakk, drinking alone .And just now I went to CGH to visit my sister, alone .Then went to Pasir Ris Park alone , cause I didn't want to go with my family so I went earlier .And after buying ciggies, I've got 40 bucks left .So ? DRINK AGAIN .Go buy at Cheers and sat at PRP alone .Hahaha, pompan giler pompan giler .Then around 30 mins later, after less than half Glen's Vodka gone, my sedare called and joined me .They bought their own drink and joined me .Thanks eh korang .Then came Problem One, ader orang carik pasal .Then yada yada yada .Went to chalet to meet my family and cousins .Came Problem Two, kene lecture .So ya, Life.Is.A.Bitch.Okay, back to my bitch .Okay, what the fuck is he doing ? Cause my body's getting tired of waiting . WHERE YOU ! YOU WHERE !Labels: Bummed; Forget about burying my face, I want to bang it into pieces so it would be the same as my heart .
Seeking Aina .
10:21 AM - Sunday, December 21, 2008
Lepak crew had a reunion !It was super great .As the days went by, I realise how much my friends means to me .How much they make up my life .Cause I have to be dependent on myself for my own being .Ohkay, I can't blog about this .It's too hard to continue .I just can't type .It's just the inability to describe .And the tears .Labels: Bummed; Numb . It's screaming through my head . Bury my face and I still see this .
Wave of life .
10:14 AM
I've realised it's not jealousyy .I've realised I've known this for a long time .And it doesn't matter if we ended or not, cause it have never begun .We were just fine as friends .I loved you, maybe . But it didn't feel right .The feeling was like . . . uhh . different ?As in a bad way of different . I guess I wanted to give myself a chance thats why . We rush things . When I knew, yours were just an infatuation and I was just trying .I'm just bummed with people taking advantage of me and the chances I give .He asked me to give myself a chance and him to prove something, anything .It was never love for the past months , we were just trying to prove something .We're cool, as friends .Yet, I should have listen to my friends .Damn .Now, I'm throwing every lil bit of my past (:Maybe, just maybe .I've finally felt like excited for something different .It's been a long time .Like a year or two perhaps ?Maybe, just maybe .I like my bytch, as a companion .I can't put him in the lepak people's list neither the friend's list .He's just . . . different ?Different in a good way .Oh damn, don't tell me .Don't tell me my friends were right .I'm like . . . crushing ?Labels: Bummed; Dude you were right . I've never bothered since you've never cared .
Superman went downhill .
12:02 AM - Sunday, December 14, 2008
Who the fuck do you think you are ?You've fucking cross the line from last time .But you've fucking disrespected me now .You can't fucking tell me to change .Doesn't mean you're with your girl, you can act that way .I don't give a frigging fuck, who your girl and you are .But you, off all people have no fucking rights to tell me who i should be .Don't act all 'you cant get over me, aina' in front of your girl .Don't act like you're a fucking big deal in front of her .You're just a dick to me .Cause I've known all your tricks .She will too .I've known it for a while but I didn't want to believe it .It's a shame I've love you .And it's a shame that I can't seem to get over you .I don't fucking care if you want to fuck her or whatsoever, just at least leave me out of your whatever .It's stupid that I hate your company cause you're with another girl , but still entertain you cause I don't want to be a jerk when you called me and sit next to me .I'mma talk to FyfyBytch now .He's a nice friend .(: (: (:If I was Ina, I would be thankful he had a crush on me (:You bother me .You don't matter anyway .All that mattered is us and our memories .Labels: Bummed; The boy I love dearly . Yet you leaving don't hurt that much (:
Spin around for another chance .
11:28 PM - Wednesday, December 10, 2008
I'm not plotting revenge .But it's karma, dude .You played me , you put on an act .Mine was just moving on with life and I'm not putting up and he's just a friend .A friend I'm getting to know .It's not myy fault that myy friends are trying to matchmake us .And it's not myy friend's fault that they want me to be happy cause they love me .True love, unlike yours .Maybe you and me were all an act .We all saw what happen .You hurt me yet myy friends were the ones who had to wipe myy tears .You swore me yet myy friends had to apologise for it .And you didn't even know all this .You played me once, with her .She knew about me, I knew nothing about her .And it was 3 days after myy bdae .And on myy bdae, you went to meet her before me .And you didn't even spend myy bdae with me .And now again ?You told me to fight to the end .You told me to fight for your love against those ladies .Don't you think it's enough ?You said you gave up, that's that .Don't try again .My heart closed, yet with your name in it .I suck, alotttt ." Losers make promises . Winners make commitments. "Labels: Bummed; I'm the winner. You're the loser. Love's the judge
1:07 AM - Monday, December 8, 2008
Ahahaha . Some friends just can't be trusted eyhh ? It's my deep secret and I definitely do not want others to know . Eyhh fuckkk .Anyway , that's not a big deal . This is the big deal . Imagine this, I went home from work . Met myy friends and came AffikBabyy or should I say AffikAhole . He was with this girl . And he didn't sit with me and my friends, he sat with that girl . And he slept on the girl's lap . Ohh, he was truly enjoying himself . Keep this in mind, he calls me his babyyy .And then in the night we talked . And he asked me if I saw the girl he brought just now . I said yes , with a big DUH there . And he asked if I knew who that was . So I say the girl he's dating . And he said, he using that girl for moneyy . And that he making that girl his girlfriend . And that my attitude suckss . And the phone went dead .So my pride was hurt, ALOT . And yeah, I shattered . But I left him a message wishing him all the best with the girl . And he called me again, I hung up . And her called again, so I picked up cause I've got the idea he's never gonna give up till he breaks me completely into amino acids . And guess what, he said it was all an act to hurt me ! And that his heart is always with me . Heyho, he's one damn good actor . Cause my friend saw that girl's picture as his screensaver 3 days ago .The thing I don't get is, he said he needed space as his exams were coming so I laid back . And he brought that girl down and told me he was studying with her . And I trusted him . And myy attitude sucks ? Everything I do to him isn't right . Sucks doesn't it ? Yes, he does .And guess what, he told me, that he's just playing around with girls, alot of girls . Keep this is mind, he calls me baby stiel (:And now, he's at that girl's grandmother's house to meet the girl's family . Awesome ! I've made a conclusion that if I ever get mad at him, he would say this, "I've told you already what about all the girls . Why should you get mad ?" Which means I have no right to be mad cause he gave me a warning . Daym, I'm super dumbb .Alright eventhough I'm writing like it's not hurting, it hurts so bad that it's so numb ."No matter how much you disgusts others, I've never asked you to change your anything . But you asked me to change myy everything . "Labels: Bummed; I love him . He used me . I feel used .
